Life should be a walk in the park (a National Park ideally)

I've been writing a lot lately but in a book so it felt odd to all of a sudden be here again with a keyboard and a year and a half since I last shared thoughts on the WWW. I don't think anyone actually reads my blog-posts but I find great joy in reading these spontaneous bursts of words when I do and thus I am potentially writing for myself.

I moved back to Brisbane last year in October so it has almost been a year in the city that educated me on a number of fronts. I love this city and it's so wonderful to be here for many reasons. I have old friends, familiar environments, arts and culture, the river, it's not too busy and not too quiet, there is life and light and it's close to lots of different forests and a few delicious beaches too. I still can't drive and the opportunity to go to the forests has been far and few between but when someone kindly invites me to join them my heart almost explodes with excitement.

Earlier this year I went to Lamington National Part with a friend and it was just magical!

We didn't do a long hike but each step was like I was given an extra year of life because being surrounded by the greenery, fresh water and sounds of birds makes me feel so refreshed, invigorated and vibrant. The same friend also took me to Cedar Creek in Samford on a really hot Summers day. Again the joy that emanated from my cells was like drinking water when really thirsty. Yesterday I had another joyous experience hence me writing today. I should in fact be marking essays or looking at my upcoming assignments but the day so shifted my being that I was inspired to write about it.

A new friend (whose birthday it was) and I left around 7am for the drive down to the Currumbin Hinterland as we were excitedly heading to the Springbrook Mt. Cougal walk. The drive itself was quite beautiful with splashes of green and creeks passing us by frequently. I think we were both so eager to get out of the city so everything looked enticing - the grass was already greener through our rose coloured lenses. Upon arrival my legs were so ready to do whatever the path dictated that I exerted far too much energy on the initial steep start...so much so that I ripped a couple of holes in my tights (note to self was don't wear tights on a bush-walk - there's a reason why hiking pants are made of more durable material). Holes and all I couldn't care - I was breathing in the sweet aroma des plants and listening to the seductive music of the forest - nothing could kill my jam!

The views were absolutely delightful and we were both humbled by the majestic land before us. To think that it was once an active volcano lava filled and explosive and now just a haven for trees and plants of all shapes and sizes. Mt Warning waved willingly at us on one side and on the other was David Freeman's Organic Farm. The different shades of green were tantalising on the eyes and the clouds shifted and changed the art piece according to their will. We flirted with different trees and Liam even climbed up a fig that had successfully killed it's host leaving a hollow centre that entices the climber to leave the safety of the earth and head for higher pastures.

We stopped and listened to the call of the birds, we admired the textures of the barks and for those 6 hours the Park was our playground and we were players spoilt for stimulation. The Xanthorrhoeas were enormous and the Giant Spear lilies created a tunnel that made us like hobbits. The intricate designs of the orchids and their ability to grow on rock were mesmerising and the red ants carrying the loot luscious. I rose in love over and over again and know that they (all the inhabitants of the park) too love me. We scrambled up a rock face and got lured into a cave filled with wonder and mysticism for it revealed the mysteries of life as we sat in the darkness and eventually started to see the light. We tripped over reeds and lost out footing a few time - each trip re-iterating the joy of being alive - awakening any slumbering cells and reminding them that their job is to thrive not just survive.

We philosophised and shared tales of life and love we sat in silence and stood in awe. We laughed and we sang we smiled and took deeper breathes that usual. We yelped with satisfaction and we gave thanks for the gift of the life force around us. Then with our cells polished and our skin lovingly caressed by the foliage we boarded out vehicle and set forth to the ocean for some salt and sand therapy. It was my first swim since winter wound us in her womb and the sea, as always, remembered just what points to press to release the tensions that lie deep within. She tickled my toes with the fine follicles of sand and she styled my hair with her magical elixir. The sun often works in cohoots with her and despite not being the middle of the day I was air dried and readied for the week to come.

On our drive home - we were transformed. We'd left Brisbane seeking and we arrived found.

Life should really be a walk in the Park! 

New beginnings

The month of March was a month of many changes. I decided to follow Lent this year and gave up alchohol and meat - 40 days of giving my body a break from the routine intake of both seemed like a a grand idea. Coincidentally I also finished my last pill packet and was due to start again but life had other plans because my relationship of 3.5 years came to a crashing end on February 28th after  we watched Lion.

So on 1st  March I was meat, alcohol, pill and relationship free. Two by choice and the latter because he had been having doubts for a while about what he wanted in life and it became clear to him that the relationship was prohibiting him from his personal growth. I tried to fight but in the end had to accept that he needed this for himself and it was nothing personal. Easy to type that now that I've had some distance from it but at the time it felt as if my heart had been ripped out of my chest and then thrown onto a highway in peak hour traffic in Germany on the Aautobahn. I felt like all my dreams were shattered and there was no way I was going to make it through a minute let alone an hour.

Those were the internal feelings I did in fact continue with life - I tried my best to function despite the vacuum in the space where love once lived. I focused on all the dreams that were to evaporate. The unborn children and how lonely I would be without him by my side. I felt as if I had failed at love (again) and was sooo full of self pity and woe is me. I cried each time I told people the story. I cried each time I thought about the story. I cried when I deleted the photos of us from my phone. I cried when I looked in my cupboard and saw the dresses he'd recently bought me for my birthday....I did a lot of crying. I felt as if I were mourning the death of a loved one. I then got angry at myself for not being a better girlfriend. Then I got angry at him for putting me in that situation and then I felt sorry for myself again. I spoke to anyone who would listen about the pain and unfairness that had been thrust my way - my mom being my longest standing victim of woe stories.

I was not constantly a pain in the bum, there were many moments of acceptance, understanding, clarity but they were short lived between tears. I remember I had one day whereby I didn't cry for about 16 hours. And I was feeling bursts of happiness that were so beautiful amidst all the sorrow. Anyways to cut a long story short, on 31st March I made a decision to stop being a pain in the backside and stop with all the "luxury pain" there are people who are suffering atrocities on a daily basis that include absence of food, shelter, stability...not to mention others who are constantly exposed to death, war and disaster and there I was dying because a man whom I loved didn't want to be my life partner anymore. He never cheated on me, never beat me, never even said a bad word to me - he simply wasn't ready to take our relationship a step further. And then with the right neurons connected I woke up on Saturday feeling like a new person.

I had to put on my big girl shoes and go to Brisbane to speak at a Professional Development gathering for Queensland English Language schools. And Since that morning so much beauty has happened. Breaking free of the trap of self pity has opened up so many doors and it has only been three days. The realisation of how powerful our mind is has blown me away. I've theorised about it but I see now how easily one can fall into a trap of negative thoughts and how it can such you down into the pits...repeating the same negative story over and over again and giving no room for star gazing. I know that I'm not the first person to be left in the world and I certainly won't be the first.

Healing is a beautiful process. Falling in love with oneself is a gift. Friendship is magic.

(late post - written in April 2017)

Being a new teacher and trying to do the RIGHT thing.

So....I've started teaching again which is absolutely wonderful. I thoroughly enjoy teaching and I'm much better at it than I was at fruit picking AND as I love people I am so happy to have that regular interaction and also the ability to share something that I know about - the English language. I've had a few days at the school covering and they were great - one day was less great but the rest of my cover days were superb - left me feeling amazing and for that I felt they were successful days. Yesterday was test day and again - successful day! The students did their preparation before the test and then did the test, marked the test and mission success! TODAY was for me an unsuccessful day as a teacher in my books and I came home feeling pretty bummed. SO many things that could go wrong in a classroom did and my reactions were not always as good as I would have liked them to be because I was trying soooooooooo hard to do a good job and follow the rules and I started teaching the lesson and not the learners. I failed today and I don't really like failing or feeling like I've failed. I don't think anyone does so it's not as if I have discovered a new emotion - but the overwhelmingness of the emotion caught me by surprise.

The day started alright - some error correction - some eliciting of vocabulary related to where people live - some ranking and then please open your books - and BAM everything went downhill from there. The moment you open the books some people really exploit the speaking exercises and enjoy the process - and then others say two words to one another and then complete all the rest of the exercises in the book because the quest to finish everything is more important that speaking and using the language and then my detailed plan on how I was going to transition on the next exercise is lost because 1/3 of the class have already done the exercise and are sitting there wanting to use their phone and all that I have to say is useless because alas the task is completed and thus why would they need to listen! ( I sound jaded but I'm purely speaking from my emotional point of view so excuse the slight irrationality of my thoughts). So then I was juggling some people who were firing though the exercises as exercises cause they've done it before...others learning it for the first time....others focusing on the talking and following instructions to a T. Then some expressed how BORING the subject was - others expressed how HARD the subject was and others just had their phone. THEN....one of my most diligent students started crying and then my most arrogant student became more arrogant and then I spent time trying to convince him that if he doesn't know something rather than saying yes I know it he should ask and I would do my best to assist him. Then I blew my fuze cause people were using their phones then I set a speaking task and they wanted to go outside and the half of the class that couldn't be bothered BEGGED me to let them go and do the speaking task outside. And I acquiesced and then they stayed out for 30 minutes (which was a relief cause I could pay attention to the other half that were in the class) and then they returned and it was obvious that they had done nothing out there but relax in the sun - which wasn't so bad but they LIED and told me they had been doing something but they hadn't been. Oh.....and then the class ended and I felt like a failure got home and CRIED like a baby!

Tomorrow is a new day and I'm sure it'll be better but for now wah wah wee wah is my feeling. I have over the period of writing this drank a glass of wine and have to admit I'm feeling better. I think when I taught at EF I was so used to the system of trying to move away from the book and teach the point then come back to the book and solidify what you have taught whereas now I'm trying to accomplish all the tasks in the book and also add extra stuff to jazz up the lesson. I'm also doing my best to teach all the points in the one session because I'm not the sole teacher of the group and don't yet feel the freedom to organise my week according to the whole picture but am focusing on the small blocks that need to be achieved in a day.

I still love teaching and I'm looking forward to going in tomorrow and consolidating what I feel was a mess.

The Cleansing Rain

It's raining outside and has been intermittently doing so for the last 24 hours. The clouds dominate the sky, the shades of green on the trees are dampened, the floors are soggy and the air is fresh. I really like the atmosphere that rain brings with it and am particularly enjoying this release of water because we emptied the water tank and I was feeling awfully guilty about the long hot showers I've been enjoying this past month. I like knowing that the tank water is being replenished, the plants are being given some liquid loving and I feel a great sense of calm and relief.

I worked this morning in the pouring rain - I didn't want to use the raincoats provided because they make me hot and sweaty and less flexible when bending so I got REALLY wet. I started the day feeling a bit down - I thought it was just one of those days that one ought to just stay in bed and not offend the world with one's presence. It was a carry over from yesterday because I had my first day of relief teaching. I was SOOOO excited about getting to teach - I had spent two weeks looking forward to the day, I spent almost two hours putting together a riveting lesson, was super anxious the night before - woke up a few times thinking my alarm wouldn't go off at the right time, got to the school super early and had the classroom all set up and pumped with good vibrations. I was oozing positivity and begging for the acceptance of the group with my public charm turned onto a thousand. I had a good lesson (nothing spectacular but also I hope not boring) with some lovely students (6 different nationalities - Japan, Korea, France, Spain, Swiss, Saudi Arabia rep-representing) and then ...then... it ... was ... over! All the anticipation and built up feelings about FINALLY doing a day in the classroom and being a teacher and sharing time and space with students and then it ended and I felt like a deflated hot air balloon. I knew that the one day with the students was the end - I'd have to wait until the beginning of July to get the chance again.

I experienced an anti climax times one million and so I got home and like an empty zombie-ex-teacher just went with the empty flow of life that was presented. I ate, slept, woke, went to the farm, started picking and then...RAIN! Beautiful cleansing delicious rain came down and wet my clothes and wet my hat and wet my gloves and wet my hair and wet my skin and this amazing rain wet my already dampened mood and all of sudden I felt magnificent. I felt like the the rain had filled me up again, gave me a boost of energy and instead of a hot air balloon I became a well - full of glorious wet rain water. But it didn't stop there oh no! The clouds had a beautiful surprise in store for me.

I was bone chilled upon returning home and knowing that the tank was filling up I savoured my HOT warming shower, had a replenishing nap and woke up on the right side of the bed feeling like a million hot air balloons ready for action - a fleet ready for the journey to a new land filled with all the artisans, artists, farmers, nurses, doctor and teachers! And the rain continued to pitter patter outside and I got an email asking me to teach two days next week again!

A good day it has been thanks to the rain! The cleansing and generous rain.

A lot of Passion (fruit) in my Life!

Long distances between writing and in my mind I have had many a time that I wanted to write but to actually go the distance hasn't been my forte. I have moved back to Australia after having lived away for 10 years. I packed  up my life of four years in Cape Town and have now been here for 3 months. Here is the Sunshine Coast Hinterland where rather than the sound of traffic, the sound of Kookaburras tickles my ears. There are also some whip birds that whip my ears into action when ever they cry their cry to action. Trees are all around the house so my eyes are ever satisfied to see my favourite shades of green so often.

Life is a bit slower here than in The Mother City - things are a lot calmer too. My mind is calmer and I've had more opportunity to lose myself in books books beautiful books. I've fallen in love with Tom Robins and have re-established my deep relationship with Haruki Marukami. Tom takes me to a wild tangled head of hair filled with word-play and wildness. Haruki-San just wraps me up in his arms and transports me to a liminal dream state where upon the ordinary becomes extraordinary. He is gifted! I was unemployed for a while so reading really helped me give me a sense of purpose in this purpose driven world. I was struggling initially because I felt as if I no longer had any use - I felt as if being in the classroom at EF and on the stage with Bonfire was my one and only calling and to be unemployed doing nothing but swimming and playing tennis was the lowest I could fall on the meaning of life. It was but a short period of nothingness - eventually I realised this was a grand opportunity to enjoy my abundance of free time and I dove in with all enthusiasm and started doing things I love - like reading.

I now have a job! I am a Farm Labourer according to my superannuation form and my field of expertise is Agriculture more specifically Picking Passionfruit. I toyed with planting garlic for a couple of days which was the beginning of my Agricultural labouring - I couldn't walk properly for a week cause about a million new muscles had been brought to life no longer dormant they cried and cried like a new born baby shocked at the disaster that life outside the womb is. They made toilet sitting a chore and to have to pick something off the ground was a real faux pas in my physical vocabulary. Then I was poor and needed more of a purpose than reading Dance Dance Dance and the opportunity arose - To Pick Passion Fruit or NOT to Pick Passion Fruit. Arnold and I debated the pros and cons of having an income again and agreed the answer was to inject some Passion Fruit into our daily existence.

Every morning at 5.15am the alarm sings a sweat harmony luring me into the tangible world. The kookaburras and whip  bird then like a Greek Chorus support the lead Phone and I like a victim of fate rise to the call of adventure. Firstly though breakfast of champions then twenty minutes of Triple J listening to my frien Matt Okine making the world a funnier place. Gloves on, Hat balanced on my head the journey up and down the rows of Passion fruit then becomes my world for 3-5 hours. We are usually 5 - 7 pickers all armed with a bucket and lust for adventure. Up and down the rows we go bending down to save the fallen fruit from the sun which will shrivel it up into a passion prune. We fill the buckets up with which we use to then fill the crates which then get sent to shed which then get sorted and packed - the pretty fruit go to the stores where they're sold to customers wanting a bit of passion in their lives - the less attractive ones which might have had a touch of sun or just blemished from lack of nutrients get sent to the Juice Factory where they make sweet sweet passion punch! I have officially been a picker for 3 weeks. There are pros and cons as with everything in life! Pros being that my bank has become useful for storing the money that I make and I can buy coffee without crying that life was so much cheaper in Cape Town. Pros being that I can squat for 5 hours and not be as damaged as I was when I did two day of garlic planting. Pros being that when it's bed time my head hits the pillow and boy is sleep heavenly! More pros - I'm stronger, the nature is so beautiful, I appreciate food pickers more, I have time to job hunt for the rest of the day, I can eat at least two passion fruit a day, I'm picking with Arnold, I'm going to learn to drive, I'm getting really far in Candy Crush. Cons - it's HARD WORK!!!!!! My body is sore every day, my joints ache, my back aches, my shoulders ache, my fingernails are dry and brittle, I wear the same outfit every morning, we pick even when it rains, the fruit look like eggs and I feel like I'm on an eternal easter egg hunt, I'm not the fastest and sometimes get competitive even though its unnecessary,  I smell like hay, I'm buggered for the rest of the day. I'll be picking until July as thats when I have my first teaching job coming in - I'm told the cons get easier and the pros can only get better and better.

Having this time has offered me reflection time too - My time at EF was like no other I'd ever had and I'm sure it impacted my being on multiple levels. I had the opportunity to meet so many incredible humans with whom I had the honour of learning from and assisting them in developing their English. I was constantly inspired by the students both in and out of class and I know that I can walk the Earth knowing that there are a lot of really beautiful souls out there. I've taught students from all over the world and from different backgrounds religiously, culturally and of course physically. I always boasted that I no longer needed to go and see the world because the world came to me in my classroom - and I attest that that was such a gift. I was daily able to expand my world view by just walking 7 minutes from my home to the classroom and BAM - expansion! I was of course teaching the creme de la creme of society but non the less there were some good folk. And the team I worked with was pretty cool too!

Cape Town is a really stunning city in terms of the nature - one can never tire of gazing at the mountain in all of her glory - the shifting clouds, the range in colours depending on the time of the day, the constant presence that she emits on the city is inescapable. And from the top of the mountain one is mesmerised by the endless views that span out each way. After that climb to be able to rest your eyes and savour the view is tatilizing gift she graces you with. The beaches are gorgeous, the water is cold, the forests are accessible and there's always something beautiful to see. Always a place to watch the sunset or if you're up for it the sunrise. Then there's the buzzling city - long street and it's craziness/dirtiness, kloof street and its hipsters, Observatory and its avant garde international crowd, Camps Bay and its pompousness yet charm, Bo Kaap and its colourful culture, De Waterkant and its oh so fabulousness, Sea Point and it's promenade where Arnold and I ran many a fine 10km journeys - the wonders are endless. 

Things I miss are the energy, the diversity and the school. The energy in the city is something different to anywhere in Australia or the parts of Europe I have traveled...there is something always cooking - something always sizzling - someone always plotting and planning the next heist or party! There's an aliveness in Cape Town that keeps the blood flowing - there's art, music, theatre, fetivals, movies, cafes, restaurants, bars, dancing, romancing, prancing and just good old vibrant energy. The diversity is also something that dispite being confronting at times is something that makes Cape Town special - there are the Dirty Rich and the Dirt Poor. There are all religions represented, there are 500 shades of brown skinned people and then 500 shades of white. There are open minded, eccentric, trance party goers and then conservative, calorie counting cyclists who bant and paleo daily. There are Jah Rastafaris living on the Mountain and picking the herbs of health from the earth our mother and there are scavenging drunk bergies beating up bins (thanks for that story Nicole). There are those who can't wait to get out and those who will stay forever and those who would give an arm to stay and soak up the sun for just a little bit longer! Diversity in Cape Town is endless - and it's captivating! And the school - because it was my cultural hub.

I changed in Cape Town - I became stronger and more independent. I got my heart broken a few times but then I fell in love with Arnold whom I hope to grow old with. I had some really lonely moments but there were more times where I felt like the luckiest human on earth - to be surrounded by so many phenomenal humans with just joy and lust for living. I got robbed and had my home completely cleared out - all my important material objects gone with no goodbye - And yet not once did I encounter danger and I learnt first hand that material objects don't make me happy - love, laughter and friendship are far superior. I danced, danced and danced a little bit more which is one of my loves. I got drunk and embarrassed myself but learnt that forgiveness and growth from errors are far more important than carrying shame. I had quarrels with loved ones that at the time I felt were irreversable but again I learnt that time does heal and to get on with life is far more fun than dwelling on the negative aspects that cannot be changed. I got to know my family better and that was the plan - I now have a relationship with members that were distant family before.

And now I'm here in Aus! Life is good. Until next time!!!

Graduation

Today eight of my students had their graduation ceremony. They come from a range of nationalitities and have each been here for either three, six or nine months. We closed down the school early and took them and our entire staff to Langa Community Centre which is in one of the oldest townships in Cape Town. It is the most developed township and it was a pleasant surprise when one of my colleagues pulled me aside and honestly asked if this was 'really' a township.

The community centre is an Artistic hub; one can do pottery, mosaic, photography, theatre, dance, music and other miscellaneous activities there. There were tourists taking tours through the building potentially as part of a township tour and there is an awesome little shop selling crockery, art, jewellery and mosaics that are made at the centre. The building is covered in colour and is incredibly vibrant and welcoming.

The students knew they were going to be visiting a township and nothing else so everything was a surprise. I think they were a bit anxious about what was to come and were afraid that they would have to make a spectacle of themselves. Luckily this was not the plan. Their first mission was to paint a mug, serving spoon,bowl or expression cup which will be glazed and kept as a totem. Then there was the ceremony.

My boss had a vision of honouring the students in a different way, in a way that they would forever look back on this day and warm their hearts so the plan was to create a ritualistic ceremony inspired by Nguni Praise Poetry and Playback Theatre. I have been a member of Bonfire Theatre Project for the past three years and due to budget limitations we couldn't hire the troupe, so instead, we asked Siphu to be our 'praise poet' and playback artist. We gathered positive quotes about each of the graduates from both staff and fellow students and then re-allocated them to the staff so each would read some praise that was not their own.

We placed the chairs in a circle as if sitting around a fire. Siphu as our leading poet recited some heightened prose specific to each individual and then pulled them into the middle of the fire and they were then showered with compliments, memories and moments as well as encouragement for future endeavours. A playback session followed this. For those of you not familiar with this form of theatre, it encompasses actors, a facilitator and an audience. The facilitator gets stories out of the audience and the actors immediately play the story back through improvisation. Ther is no discussion simply the act of making and accepting offers related to the story at hand. Siphu and I played back the stories about the proudest or most significant experience the learners had whilst in Cape Town.

Finally the students had the opportunity to honour each other and were given a physical copy of all the praise that was gathered for them. We all then jumped on a bus and went to a Chisa Nyama at Amadodas. A Shisa Nyama is the gathering of people around a butcher and a Braai (barbecue). Usually held in townships it is a time to eat good meat, drink beer, dance and be merry. We have never had a party at Amadodas before and right now as I write they are, I hope, having an absolute ball of a time.

It was a sentimental graduation for me because since I've been working at EF I have been lucky enough to be involved in about nine ceremonies which have culminated the journey for a few hundred students. They have all been spectacular in their own way and I've definitely cried at them all for the emotions released at such occasions is always cathartic. This grad though is my last one and it was in many ways one that sat close to my heart in terms of structure and content. The students were all sober and present. They were able to release some artistic energy through the painting and were then showered with words of praise that were thought through and weaver specifically for their individual growth. They were then listened to and heard and given the chance to reflect on their journey without judgment. And finally given a token that will always be a beacon in dark moments if needed. They were honoured and raised and one cannot ask much more from such an occasion.

I too was honoured this evening. Most unexpectadly by a man whom I only shared the space with for a brief time. I have been a teetotaller for the past two and a half months and thus have probably been taking advantage of my sobriety to be as extravagant as I feel when in a party atmosphere. A lot of the time alcohol is the excuse to start a party or to dance and I have taken it on as my mission to make the most of a party irrespective of the booze-meter. I dance if the music inspires me, and the music was particularly fabulous this evening as the DJ was playing three of my favourite genres. Reggae, kwaito and dirty dub step. I found my Colombian superstar (one of the graduates) and we started dancing our socks off. Taking into account it was six in the evening and for the students the party was just beginning thus no one but us were dancing, and really shaking it we were. Half an hour later the bus was leaving so I started saying my farewells. When an eccentric looking man in his 60's waring red pants, with a red bow tye pulled me aside and told me to wait 5 minutes. I politely told him I had to go as the bus was waiting but he politely told me I HAD to wait 5 minutes. I surrendered to his desire and waited. He then stopped the music, took out a mic and he praised my spirit. He fed my ego in all the ways one can desire to be fed and even kissed my feet. An eccentric move from an eccentric man but I will not lie, it felt great to have someone tell me positive things about me. It felt magnificent to feel that days of hard work were acknowledged by a complete stranger who felt moved and empowered to keep me back and stop the party to praise my ego and being. I humbly accepted his gift and then like Cinderella fled to the bus to come home.

Today was a special day on a number of levels. And I shall sleep like a baby knowing that today eight young stars were given the rite of passage to take their next step on their journey of la vida. And that maybe a new mentor has entered my life.

Finding writing again

It has been a while since I wrote,so long that I'm not sure where to start. Do I recap the past few years or like in a good diary or a good friend you just start with where you're at and what's important now. Right now, as I sit on my bed, which has been stripped of all linen, I'm surrounded by the bright white glow of naked pillows and a bare mattress. I've just climbed up and down Table Mountain and have also jumped in the freezing cold antarctic sea that always looks so welcoming yet is soo unbearable to immerse oneself in. I have a cup of rooibos with infused vanilla and the wind is gently caressing the guava tree outside. I'm feeling extremely tranquil and am extremely happy to be able to write.

Taking the time to sit down and reflect in words has always been a blessing for me yet these past few years I've rarely taken the time to do it. I've had moments of sadness where out of pure desperation I had to write in my physical journal in order to understand what the sadness was and where it sat in my mind but not taken the time to just reflect and play with the daily events that stir imagination and creativity but are lost if to captured there and then. So today before the eyes of this mine blog I commit to writing more often about the daily journeys of living and being.

I'm a teacher at EF Cape Town at the moment and have been so for the past three years.It seems that sometimes our career isn't chosen but chooses us. After four years of teaching in Norway I then committed another set period to the occupation of expanding our own world view by attempting to expand others'scope of vision. I've had a lot of students over the time I've been here and it has been extremely rewarding. I'm not the most structured of teachers but I'd like to hope that after each class there has been some learning and expansion that has taken place. I work with a great team of humans which is extremely dangerous because when there is time for change and development leaving is hard. Really hard. Really really hard. That time is coming for me again. It's a challenging time for a number of reasons that I'll try and examine because this has been sitting with weight on my shoulders. Starting afresh has perks of new beginnings yet there is such comfort in what is known and safe. I live with Arnold, my boyfriend of the last year and hopefully the rest of my Earth time. We live in a share house on Hofmeyr street in Gardens. We have eight homies and good vibes. We run twice a week along the Seapoint promenade and go to the free yoga at Yoga Zone on Thursday. We try go on an adventure every weekend and during the week we eat delicious home cooked food. A simple life we have created.

Now we have decided to go to Australia in the hope of expanding our work potentials financially. Both of us have pretty basic salaries here in the beautiful Cape and aren't feeling inspired by being broke at the end of each month desperately waiting for the next measly amount to be given for our heard efforts. Some times you have the perfect job with a less than perfect salary...money isn't e erything until you want to travel or start a family...and both of these dreams are in the pipeline. So the land down under doth call me home and beckons me to bring my Flying Dutchman across the globe into the unknown. The unknown is a bit daunting. New housemates, new work, new running route, new yoga prices, new friends, new networks, new places to buy our food, new, new, new. Now new is not always better nor is it worse, it's just NEW. And despite having had new more times than I can count it still gives me a knot in my stomachio. It still gets my mind racing and trying to play out millions of scenarios that could become realities in my waking and dosing moments. I have a great amount of faith that all will be well as it always is but I'd be lying if said I'm a vision of calm. It might be getting harder and harder to give up good things for other good things. I'm feeling a great sense of wanting it spread my roots and not have to move into a bigger pot for a while. Where I can grow my succulents and watch them transform on a yearly basis. That time will come.

I'll miss Cape Town. Of this I'm certain. The mountain cast a spell on me and she's fighting hard to convince me that this is where it's at. This is where I should be focusing my energy...but there are too many factors making me doubt here genuine concern for our future her...and when in doubt there can be a void in trust. So I hope to make the most of our remaining time here but time to spread my nomadic wings and return to the land of Oz. Perhaps, like Dorothy once I'm there I'll seek a means of returning but I'll only know that once I've taken that step.

Goals before leaving:

- climb Table Mountain once a week.
- go camping in beautiful setting as much as possible.
- run 21km
- travel up the West Coast
- have a BLAST.

Until next time keep rocking.

The courageous but brainless pigeon.

Whilst sitting and putting the last touches to my rather scatterbrained introduction essay that is due tomorrow morning, a courageous pigeon decided to take a stroll in through the open kitchen door. It paraded across the floor, did a nice little poo and the continued on into the lounge. I did no see the pigeon taking it's walk of honour through the house and after having printed out my first draft I decided to spoil myself to a cup of tea with sugar and milk and a cup-cake from Joe and Taryn's wedding, sit in the lounge and go through the essay attempting to rectify some of the oh! so grand errors that I can see yet know not how to fix. Whilst sitting there, sipping on my tea and with red pen scratching, crissing and crossing I heard a fluster of wings going wild some where, I heard and thought perhaps rocco was having a good old shake, as dogs are known to be great movers and shakers when they so feel like it. SO i proceeded to continue with my thorough damnation of my written essay and once again, this fluster of wings rattling again what sounded like a window. Not daring to further enter the lounge I decided to stroll around to the outside of the suspected window and there sitting like an empress on her thrown was a beautiful pigeon looking out through the window and terrible confused as to why she could see the world yet was bound by some invisible force that prevented her from taking flight. My initial reaction was simple, open up all possible doors and windows and gently coerce the bright and beautiful bird into simply flying out....just like I do with flies and mosquitoes when they are inappropriately sharing space with me, 'shoo, mosquito, i do not want to smack you so just fly out the window and we will both be winners.' Mosquitoes are intelligent beings when they're not suicidal and will often listen to my words of advice, so to with flies who do not simply try to fly out of one part of the window but buzz buzz buzz around the whole glass until they find a window of opportunity and take it for freedom is for the most part a much better prospect than the doom and gloom of death. Anyway, this pigeon, this bird, as beautiful and elegant as her appearances presented her, was not terribly bright and seemed to have loose bowels because she simply tried to fly in a similar manner to before the windows and doorways and portals to a better world were open and also do a helava lot of pooing. Meanwhile Rocco, sweat and noble Rocket of a dog was beside himself, how on earth had this alien being entered his territory without his knowing and why wouldn't it leave when he barked and why was it stressing out his Tanya so? He jumped at the bird and barked more and the bird flittered and flattered more and more relieving of herself on the window sill and it was all to much so Rocco and I retreated to the safety of the garden to attempt another strategy. I thought a wonderful thought scaring not scarring (just looked the spelling up and both came up....not sure which is the real gerund of to scare) the bird so picked up a harmless looking stick and threw it towards the window. This did not have the desired effect, Rocco thought we were playing fetch and launched at top speed into the garden and the bird didn't blink an eye-lid. So thought number two was to shoo the bird from the inside with a newspaper...Rocco, now in the mood for some fun jumped up and grabbed the news paper from my hand and that was the end of that idea. The not so bright at all pigeon by this stage was getting into quite a state and was frightened out of her wits. And I was babbling and babbling to the poor bird but communication was not working so I eventually opted to try and hold the bird and thrust it in the direction of freedom, after all people in movies always handle pigeons when they want to send messages to far away lands and so it is possible....so, sneaking up on it I tried to use a calm and controlled approach so that it would immediately trust me and know that I was not going to try and cook it, simply hold it for some milliseconds and then it would no longer be stuck...the brainless bird did not resonate with my thoughts and instead flittered and flattered in a fluster against the glass even more vigorously and I, afraid of it doing it's number two on my hands, also started frolicking and flinching and then miraculously I had this gentle and soft stressed out creature in between my palms, turned 90 degrees and set it off towards the light and she being able to utilize her wings in the open space gracefully flew away. Rocco thought I was the best thing since sliced bread after this bold and brave act and jumped up and down and wagged his wonderful little tail like the wings of humming bird and together we celebrated this feat by finishing off the delicious brandy soaked wedding cup cake (and him a dog biscuit). He now, so tired after the shenanigans i passed out on the carpet and I still have the arduous task of attempting to bring my essay to life.

The day journey....

Today was a day blessed with a bubbly beginning and unfolded into a spectacle of bursting bubbles blowing through the dry and hot Cape Townian bustle! A little bit of alliteration to Brighten up the Blog! Ha! Today was a lovely day in the world of I and I. I arose an hour and a half after my alarm (which has become the norm as I really don't have any where to be or any reason for rising at 7:30am) I attempted to do my morning ritual of body tapping and a little bit of of Yoga but once yoga matt was lain upon the floor and I began tapping I got terribly bored and took to plucking my eyebrows instead, which lead to chopping my fingernails and then pealing dead skin from my toes....perhaps too much detail, but a highly satisfactory experience it was. I now have nicely plucked eyebrows and VERY short finger-nails.

Morning routine thrown out the window I decided to listen to the radio whilst preparing some oats...I'm now updated on the latest music in CT and feel very happy to finally know what's in! Tomorrow morning I hope to listen to another, even 'cooler' radio station to affirm this mornings research. I gave Willow Smiths tune, I whip my head back and forth, a second chance too...the first time I heard that track I was appalled by the quality of the music coming out of the 'youth' today...this morning however I was able to do some moves to beat and look forward to our next rendezvous!

I had a big Chat with my little sister down under as it was her first day at a new school and was very happy to hear her report! She is a super trouper!!!! She however passed on other news which rattled my foundations a bit...relationships are a challenge in all shapes and sizes. One is never as lenient with other people as we are say with our pets. Other humans tend to have certain idiosyncrasies that can drive one mad or in worst case scenarios drive one to dislike or even despise others. I do feel my place in these situations hasn't ever been strong enough to come to despise another. I can see how many do come to this situation, but being the people pleaser that I am I am perhaps a bit to much of a chameleon and have a tendency to adjust accordingly in order to not have to end up despising. I have the ability to disconnect myself enough to try and make the different challenging experiences less challenging. Others with stronger wills and perhaps more integrity and conviction for what they see as right and wrong though do end up in situations which break my heart. When one has the ability to lose all hope in another whom they have loved or potentially still love but no longer hold an inch of respect then I feel rather deflated. But that is not my journey and I have to often make a decision to distance myself from others relationships even if the two parties involved are both loved ones. Each relationship must pan out in its own manner and I can only maintain the relationships with those in my sphere.

Speaking of relationships, I miss Aleksander! I miss his friendship and his council. I miss our great conversations and his intellect. I miss his acceptance of me and his honesty. It is a strange thing to miss...and I ponder this greatly lately because here in Cape Town I have my brothers and my sister-in-law as my daily companions (and the Rocket my four legged love) and I in fleeting moments miss having a friend with whom I can hang out with. After a day of reading I return from the library and am bursting with words and ideas and giggles and pokes and urges to converse and share stories and ideas and break down the activities of the day or simply banter on about some mundane topic that needs to be explored and for 6 years Aleksander was my partner in crime for such activities. Before Aleks there were good friends over the years who on a yearly basis also filled such roles...now I find myself writing to certain people whom enable my fingers to type freely to and babbling on like I do right now. So writing becomes my new friend, my new partner in crime until I meet a human I can openly share the madness with.

I went into town today, to Long street which is one of the main drags here with lots of bars, cafes, restaurants, backpackers, galleries and shops here in Cape Town. My intention was to buy tickets to a Rave I'm attending this weekend (another opportunity to boogy and socialize that I'm opening up for myself). So I bought the ticket and attempted to have small talk with the shop assistant and failed because my topic choice was a bit too brash, the amount of drugs at a Trance Party is not a standard conversation apparently. I was merely expressing that I wouldn't need drugs, that Coffee would suffice....anyways....afterwards I decided to spoil myself to some food and was immediately tempted by a Dosa Masala cafe...where I drank the most AMAZING mango Lassi and had a very tasty regular dosa masala and a frozen chai. It was so nice to be in the cafe that I read a play by Sam Shepherd entitled, Fool for love. The Cafe working Dude was lovely and offered me a little bit of small talk but I overheard him telling another customer that he had a terribly sore throat so I didn't push the small talk because I understand how uncomfortable it can be to chat when suffering such pain. The play was GREAT! which was a relief cause i'm still battling with another play: King Baabu...which I don't find so great, but it's a required reading for one of my upcoming classes so I have to battle through it. Fool for love, was a super little play, a pair of lovers are fighting cause the lad left the lass for another lady but has returned to re-light the flame of their relationship...she's not willing and has decided to move on and this makes him even more determined to win her love. Her new love potential comes and the two men get into discussions about the lad and the lasses relationship and it turns out they're half siblings sharing a father....(the plot thickens) but had an insatiable love for each other since their teenage years...she then gives in and decides to let him be her lover again, they hug, kiss, declare their love, he has to go to his car and he leaves her...a strange ending...yes...not what i expected but the play was written so well and I was engaged throughout it and my imagination was running wild with ideas on how to stage it and I could relate so much to what the characters were saying and THAT'S THEATRE!!! King Baabu bores me and i can't relate to any of the characters and I find it tedious and meaningless (for me).

SO after reading this play and feeling might inspired I returned to the Library and began to read another play, Topdog/underdog which I'm still reading. When the library closed I proceeded to wait for the Glorious Free Jammie Shuttle back to the main campus. As I sat and read two gentlemen approached and enquired as to whether I spoke french or not. I told them I did not speak french and they wanted to know why and I informed them that I've never lived in a french speaking country that has enabled me to learn how to communicate effectively. Turned out they were congolese and wanted to speak French. We then got into some very interesting conversation and I discovered that they work in the field of spreading awareness through theatre! They are a part of an NGO that deals with different social issues and one of the mediums of spreading awareness is through 'Ambush Theatre'! I'm still to find out more and do some research but based on what they told me it sounded too good to be true. Their colleagues, two beautiful congolese women, came soon after them and I was taken into their world for the duration of the bus journey.... the one lady told me she was tired...she said there was a lot of work that had to be done and she was tired....it was so wonderful to be in their company, they were so animated and ALIVE and although I could not always understand their conversations I was bubbling with joy to have been able to enter their world even for a brief bus journey.

Now I must sleep in hope of arising when my alarm clock goes off at 7:30am.

More on Ambush theatre next time!

Out of the house and onto the train...CT here I come!

I arose yesterday with a plan to go out and figure out how I was to go to and from University without a car. Anxiety sat in my system like a virus and eventually I broke down, sat on my bed and cried tears of not knowing, of being in a familiar place yet knowing that now the unfamiliarity had to be confronted, of being alone in the world despite having folk (and animals) around whom I love, of fear of being stabbed, rapped and mugged, of not having the safety of Norway or Australia around me, of having no friends, and missing my friends, of having no regular income to guarantee me the life I've lead for the past 5 years....and the list goes on, I shed tears freely and they flowingly fell and then I had a shower and got myself together, ready for the adventure of Cape Towns Public Transport.

I started the journey with a walk to an ATM where drew only an amount I thought I wouldn't mind losing (ha ha) then walked about 15 minutes towards the train station....along the way I asked a man on a bike and he had no idea where the station was, he just rode his bike and had never taken the train before. He recommended I go to the garden shop where someone would surely know...so i followed his instructions and headed there....i asked a guard at the gate and he knew not, then asked a man with some boxes and he had no idea either...then thought i should walk about 20 minutes to the left and perhaps i'd get to one there...then I saw a maintenance man who told me to walk 2 minutes round the corner and i'd be there...hurrah for the maintenance man.

I got there eventually and saw a number of people of different races gathered around there and the atmosphere was smooth....NOT what I was expecting...i foresaw doom and disaster and lecherous characters dubiously creeping around ready to pounce upon the obvious fresh and unknowing new meat daring to take the TRAIN!!!!!!!! So I bought my ticket - there were two choices, metro or metro plus, the difference being 2 rand between 1st and 3rd class. I chose 1st class! Sitting on the train I looked around me and in my sparsely populated carriage once again I saw many faces of South Africa all sitting and trying to be as inconspicuous as possible...their faces apparently (according to a gentelman I met) saying I'm just here on a train and I don't want any nonsense and I'm not gonna rob you even though I'm on the train, even though i'm black or coloured or a drug addict...i'm just on the train....just like you so lets just get on with this journey. I couldn't help but smile and was reminded of the London underground and a similar cold and reserved vibe where no one wants to mess with anyone else...just minding my own business y'all! ha ha!

I arrived at the central station and headed for info, there I asked for street and was immediately asked if i was after a backpackers...no, just the street, how do i get from here to Long Street? I was given instructions and of I went....and it was fine, walking in the city was fine. I found my way and made some decisions about which direction was suitable, asked some friendly-ish looking people for further directions and received all the help I needed, people were very polite and helpful! I met a very nice coloured woman who in fact walked me up the road and informed me of how to behave on the train and when walking and how much I was going to love Cape Town and how I MUST get my drivers license and that Crime in Cape town was relative...she remembered getting her bag almost snatched in London in mid afternoon and yet she's never been robbed here....SO!

Eventually made it Hiddingh Campas and there I was fortunate to achieve all I set out to achieve in order to begin reading some of the required readings for the course....there's a lot of reading and analysing South African Theatre so I have a lot to catch up on! I then took the FREE bus to the main Campus and met Trent Nightingale, a young Cape Townian actor, recently graduated from the UCT Acting stream. He educated me from his perspective about Cape Town and grateful was I to have the opportunity to talk to a fellow thesbian about this city and her multi faceted faces. He being a Christian Coloured young man was also a very generous informer and we had a super couple of hours chatting...and sharing. He also helped me find my bearings at the Main Campus which is HUGE!!!!!

I then spent some time in the....beautiful....calm....amazing....tranquil haven of Books....the LIBRARY! What a sacred place. Students sitting at tables indulging in knowledge from pages and words, silence and serenity engulfing my being...and SOOOOO many beautiful beautiful books....hmmm....i'm so excited to have this opportunity to be a student again and have a year or two dedicated to further educating myself and. . . . learning! HURRAH FOR LEARNING!!!

I borrowed four books yesterday and I must admit, as excited as I am for the chance to learn...i also foresee a challenge for myself. The academic world has been distant for me for the last 5 years and reading these books has made me aware of how "Academic" certain books and articles are and I have to try and understand what is written despite the rhetoric and big words that are used....I've spent the day attempting to get into it and read a whole chapter on the importance of language within a society and the use of Language as a controlling factor within multi-lingual populations.....ay yay yay! Interesting: Yes! Hard to understand the language: Yes! The irony that academic language is often not able to be understood by the lay-man yet the content is speaking about that point exactly...hmmm....

Now I prepare to go and see my first South African piece of theatre for the year, a comedy about race relations in south africa...appropriate: YES!

Love and respect!

Tandi

Cape Town and New Beginnings

As I sit here infront of my machine, the wind boldly blows outside and the sun shines, there are blue skies and Table Mountain sits happily in the background. Cape Towns beautiful! I consider myself fortunate to be here and think of those in Queensland, in particular Brisbane right now surviving the floods...an experience that they will surely come through with new insight and appreciation for the simple things in life. Mother nature is striking out at certain places and no amount of technology will alter her course...floods, bush fires, drought, tsunamis, earth quakes etc...they're there some where in the world and the everyday existence of those present is altered!

Cape Town has been a pretty wild experience so far, I arrived last Sunday after a long flight and a few hours in Transit in Windhoek, and went straight to my cousins wedding, where all of my family were gathered....it was wonderful to see them all and also a bit overwhelming. I then hopped in a car with my brothers and headed to a hens night for my brothers - now wife - then fiance - and we set off to a botanical garden where thousands were gathered to see a South African rock group. There was lots of champagne drunk and lots of fun and laughter...then when the gig was done, we decided to go to a bar for one drink and then head out for dinner with more family.....one drink turned into ten and at 3 in the morning after pole dancing and lots of hugging and "I love you's!" we stumbled our way home and fell into a drunken slumber...which lead to a drunken recovery next day....and a painful one at that!

(Tuesday) That day was a wasted day! And the next day spent shopping for a bridesmaids dress and some shoes to go with it...I found a lovely simple one after wandering the shops for hours. On Wednesday was my birthday, spent first of all lining in a queue for four hours in order to put in an application for my South African passport...it was a colourful experience, there were the many faces of South Africa in the Home office, some, like me, applying for their passports, others registering marriages and other registering births. There were Black Africans, White Africans (of both British and Afrikaans heritage), there were Coloured Africans, Zimbabweans, Nigerians etc....and I saw an image of the New South Africa, the rainbow nation that is hard to see in such close confines on a daily basis. Together we suffered the banality of bureaucracy and rejoiced when our mission was accomplished! I then got some other administration done like getting a south african number and finding a dentist. I had a delicious barbecue with my immediate family and then away into slumber I ventured again!

Thursday saw the family reuniting once again for a wedding rehearsal and then a nice sushi lunch, laughs and good vibrations...Friday I spent 3 hours in a line applying for my Learners licence and had a wee scare because I fainted in the line....they called the ambulance and I discovered that I have a very low blood pressure and that heat and lack of salt may result in my fainting in public....oops! I got my application in which was wonderful and then went shopping with my little brother to get him some clothes that fit him because he is growing like a sunflower in the perfect conditions, he was easy to shop for as he knew exactly what he liked and did not like which made the experience a glorious one.

Then Saturday came and that was the wedding day...and it was Perfect! Simple and smooth, fun and touching, funky and traditional! There were so many beautiful and amazing people that have been a part of My Brother and his Wife, Taryn's lives gathered to celebrate their joining. The speeches were short, quick and humourous and the grooving was funky too....when they departed, we partied on till about 5 in the morning and once again I found myself waking up feeling awful due to too much booze yet blissful for all the fun and laughter that was experienced. Sunday however was not a wasted day, we had a barbecue and more family time as my dad was due to leave the next day to head back to Mozambique...and the last few days i've spent just trying to get my head around the whirlwind of activity that has passed...yesterday I spent the day in bed, so happy to just lie down and have absolutely nothing that I had to do.

Next Are the explorations of how to get to and from uni in one piece :)

Retreat (from an email to a buddy)

I went to a Vipassana Meditation Retreat in Thailand at the end of my trip. I'd always wanted to experience 10 days of silence so I found one that fitted into my travels and made my way south, despite weather forecast warnings of heavy rain, cyclones and tsunamis in the surrounding areas. I had no real knowledge as to what such a retreat would entail, through the grape vine I'd heard of a girlfriend who had found herself crying for 5 days and had had a life changing experience as a result of her experience. And others I met a long the way who had previously attended simply smiled and said, 'Enjoy' without disclosing anything more.

The setting was very close to nature, the property was a 25 minute walk from the main highway and the contrast from cement and cars to trees and tranquility couldn't have been greater. The architecture was very basic, open concrete halls - sturdy and practical, no adornments such as paint and only a few pictures of the founding Monk Buddhadasa Bhikkhu scattered sparingly around. The rest was nature, nature, nature! The dormitories were basic 3 by 4 square meter cubicles with a concrete slab for the bed, a straw mat for the mattress, a blanket, mosquito net and a wooden pillow to elevate your head during slumber...my room had about 10 spiders in various ceiling locations, a gecko and some centipedes when I first entered and i think when I left there may have been more. There were 8 western toilets (which I cleaned each day as a chore) and 6 large water basins where one could fill their bucket and use to cleanse the body (no showers or hot water). There was however a natural hot spring which was available for our use twice a day, the water was 40 degrees and glorious!

The daily routine was as follows:

4am Wake up to bells chiming rhythmically for 10 minutes.
4.30 Morning readings.
4.45 Meditation.
5:30 body meditation (Yoga, Qigong and Tai chi),
7am Meditation/Dhamma talks.
8am Breakfast, Chores, own time (and hot springs).
10am Dhamma talk/meditation.
11am Walking meditation/sitting meditation
12.30 Lunch, chores, own time
2.30 Dhamma talk
3.30 Walking meditation/sitting meditation
5pm Chanting
6pm Hot chocolate/own time (hot springs)
7.30 Sitting and group walking meditation
9pm Bed
9.30 Lights out

All this in silence for 10 days. Some very committed people chose to also abstain from eye contact. Men and women were encouraged not to make eye contact as the opposite sex can be (are) a distraction :) Our dorms were separate and we did not share the same hot springs either.

This was a phenomenal experience for me.

I had been on the road for 4 months, I'd been through Russia, China, Laos, Vietnam and Cambodia and each place had had a different vibe for me personally regarding my activities as a traveler, the latter two been quite extravagant regarding partying and indulgence, and I'd also had a resurgence of guilt regarding my ex-boyfriend as he had decided that he needed to distance himself from me for a period of time and had sent a couple of quite heavy emails raising question about my morality and choices I'd made. Upon arrival in Thailand my emotional stability was rocky and the over-touristic, hedonistic and consumer driven atmosphere of Bangkok was also affecting my better senses. I'd had 2 days of island tranquility before the retreat to try and calm my nerves before the silence and I was anxious as to whether or not I was in the right state of mind to attend such an event...the fear of falling apart nagging at me.

Upon arrival however all worries and fears dissipated and throughout the process I let go of so much baggage I had been carrying around...and all cause of breathing! Just focusing on breath! That's all the meditation was focused on, breath, breath, breath. Long breath, short breath...just being aware of breath. I was blown away. There was also a lot of information presented in the Dhamma talks about the principals of Buddhism and releasing the self, I, me and myself. As well as the cycle of suffering and how humans get tangled tangled in the web. I learnt a lot of theory and feel a lot more knowledgeable about Buddha, his journey and his legacy. The breath and practice of living now was the greatest gift I received though.

The Journey Seems like a Dream

I am currently in Toowoomba, Australia with my Mum and Nikita. My little sister is no longer little, she is in her second last year of school and is pretty much a full blown human. My mother is well and currently in the process of movement, a new job requires relocation. And me, well...I'm here! I'm here right now in front of the machine and that's all I've got. Since I last blogged a tremendous amount of activity has occurred and no longer is...I passed through Vietnam, Cambodia and Thailand and then arrived here in the land down under almost a week ago. It feels as if the journey was but a dream though, everything here and now is so real that 5 months of gallivanting from Europe to South East Asia does not feel real...and all I've got to show for it are a couple of Tattoos, some t-shirts and little nick-naks here and there...my internal journey of course is a different ball game and the experiences will always exist in the fibre that binds my body and prevents me from falling apart. And I was honoured to have made some new friends along the way, I met some people who have made my smile stretch from ear to ear and generously shared time and space with such fervour and love for which I'm eternally grateful.

I shall try and share some stories and thoughts about the trip though, for it really did happen and I'm an altered human due to the wonderful journey that enfolded upon a whim. I succeeded in having a journey that took me to me and exposed me to new worlds and humans, new thoughts and experiences, new sights and energies, new food and emotions...There were ups and downs! There was sobriety and delusion! There were tears yet an abundance of laughter, silence and noise, darkness and light, fear and bravado and I was there for it all and came through the other end with a smile on my face and health in my system!

I wrote an email some days ago and decided to cut and paste parts of it, so here are some snippets:

"From China I headed down to Laos where I was swept into the relaxed and peaceful world of the Laos people. Things don't move very fast and things don't happen very quickly. A boat trip said to take 5 hours could take 8, a bus trip said to be 9 hours could take 16. There was no rushing and things just flowed and happened when they wanted to. In Laos there are places with no cars and the only way to access them is by boat. Once there the one road is shared with cows, pigs, chickens, children playing games and fellow humans on feet. People greet each other simply because they pass each other on the street and if in the know a simple greeting could take a few minutes because there is time for such interaction. The nature all of a sudden became subtropical and lush, giant butterflies fluttered about, leeches squirmed in the bushes, trees hovered above seemingly touching the sky and the different shades of green presented a pallet for the eyes delight. Wide and generous Smiles hopped from face to face and an acceptance of life's treasures sat secretly behind each face. Here Buddhism too had a hold of the people yet a simpler less ritualistic existence for the monks was evident (no mobile phones and fancy cameras were owned by the Monks as they were with the Tibetan and Chinese Monks). Barefoot they walked about begging for alms and spreading loving kindness and tranquility in their paths. Trips on boats along the rivers were for me a highlight, sitting in a boat and watching the world go by around me...and the world being one of wild tropical nature. Monkeys swinging in the trees and birds swooping about! The food was also a treat, tropical fruit shakes everyday, coconut water flowing at every corner, vegetables grown in rich soil not contaminated by pesticides or too much high technology, a tomato smelling and tasting like a tomato. A banana without the powdery taste of been plucked to soon from her tree....mangoes....dragonfruit....lychees.....hmmm....


Vietnam was a complete change from laid back Laos....all of a sudden things got faster and more efficient and organised. People became a bit less smiley and more determined to get their dollar from you, you who are just a tourist and a source of income. Beneath the strong exterior though one can always find the human and they too were good people even if they wanted you to believe otherwise at times. Communism became more apparent and red flags waved at every corner, especially in the North, around Dien Bien Pho (where they defeated the french) and Hanoi. Up in the North I visited a place called Sapa that was very chilled and relaxed in comparison to the rest of the county and there one could get lost in the mountains walking for days through different villages where the hill tribes of the H'mong people (and other tribes) live. Rice paddies dominated the landscape and the temperatures were cooler. The rest of my time in vietnam was along the tourist route and I traveled with a young man who lived to Party so together we partied from the North to the South. We ate some of the most delicious and fresh Vietnamese food...always the best food coming from the streets rather than the restaurants. We visited sacred sites but were often disappointed because a lot of it was done up post the wars and therefore had a feeling of being slightly fake and designed purely for the tourists enjoyment ... this was not always the case...just often! Halong bay was a highlight though, the Limestone Islets protruding out of the water were a sight and a half and cruising along on a boat to see them was pretty special. Very touristic which is expected as it is Vietnam's Eiffel tower in many ways so no escaping that.

From the Hustle and Bustle of Ho Chin Minh City I returned to tranquility, in Cambodia. It is the poorest of the South East Asian Countries and despite been so close to Vietnam and Laos was a new world once again. It's own history, it's own story and it's own way of doing things. The people too looked different and had a general different vibe to them. More smiles yet not with the same relaxed nature as the Laos. There are endless possibilities to volunteer ones services in Cambodia from being a presence in an orphanage to teaching English to local entrepreneurs. I didn't get involved with anything but met many who had and said it was an experience worth doing over and over again because in that way one is able to really connect to the people rather than simply purchasing food and accommodation from those running businesses. I had planned to speed through Cambodia over to Thailand but ended up staying almost 3 weeks. I met some really lovely people and just had to stop and breath after the wild partying adventures in Vietnam. There I spent time by the beach and entertained the many children selling what ever they could to the tourists in order to earn some cash. I let them paint my nails, give me massages, make bracelets and slowly but surely take money money money...being bombarded by children selling stuff was something I experienced only in Cambodia and it was pretty intense because they were business savvy and used the fact that they were cute kids to their best advantage, they would play on cuteness and if that didn't work they would try for empathy, "i need to buy new school uniform", "I have no parents" etc...it was a tough things deal with for me...especially cause I've worked with kids for the past 4 years, kids the same age as them...but again new experiences.

The ruins of Angkor Wat were pretty impressive and after 3 days of exploring that ancient Kingdom I was exhausted from all the stimulus. There were not so many tourists when I was there and I felt overwhelmed, I can only imagine what it must be like in Peak season! But they were amazing. In particular what stood out was the power of nature. The strength of the trees to burst through stone and engulf such big structures in her vines and roots. having a tree growing over a wall was just phenomenal!"

Until next time....

Love and respect

Tandi

Technology sucks some times!!!!

I sat for 3 hours the other day and wrote one of my most epic blogs about my time in Laos and as I pressed publish I lost everything...I was so disheartened that I could not bring myself to spend any time, other than a quick facebook update, in front of the machine. So now I hope to build the stamina to share some of my adventures. I will not do it now as I have a day of exploring to do here in Hue, Vietnam but I wanted to write and say I am soooooo well and happy and that everything is going as it should. Love from me to you!

Sleeper bus and Farewell to China for now...

Last night I took my first sleeper bus! What a fabulous fabulous way to travel long distance. I took a 15 hour bus ride from Riga to Moscow and ended up with swollen feet and a sore back. On the sleeper bus from Dali to Jing Hong life couldn't have been better for my back or feet. Perhaps if I were a bit taller I would be complaining dramatically cause my height is the limit for a comortable journey I think. There were moments where I had to move my head back up to the top of the bed so my legs could regain the private space...it was luxury and I had most splendid dreams. The only issues might have been the gas release of some of the passengers and the smell of the pillow and blanket but those are minor details in the grand scheme of things.

So, I am now in Jing Hong the capital of Xichuanbanna and I have entered a new world in my China horizons. Here it is a tropical paradise. Palm trees line the roads an oppressive and humid heat fills the atmosphere, the people are soooooooooo chilled out and relaxed and in the 10 hours I've been here i've seen 4 foreigners so I feel like I've left the tourist hoards up north in the cool of the mountains. The minority people here are dominant and I've also seen many Indian looking salesmen, perhaps they are burmese I don't know, but they are dark skinned and all speak English very well. They also wear a sarong and a white singlet, a uniform that sets them apart from the local inhabitants in their bright hats (or their modern get-up). The streets are lined with tropical fruit, mangoes, dragonfruit, mangostines, pawpaws etc...and earlier there was thunder threatening us with rain. I don't think it came though cause it seems fairly dry outside.

I won't be here long unfortunately and fortunately as I've bought my ticket for a Bus to Loas tomorrow morning at the crack of dawn. Dario is in Luang Prabang for another day or two and I don't want to miss him before he heads back to India his land of choice. So I will be leaving China...beautiful and wonderful China! It has really grown on me, of course I have only really seen but a fraction of what she has to offer but that has been enough to develop some serious feelings for her. I met a woman this morning who has travelled from Moscow to here as well and we shared our travel stories. She, I think is more of an adventurer than I as she walks and walks and walks when ever she gets the chance. In mongolia, where she spent a month, she found a stream and simply walked along it for 2 weeks then had to find a way to get back to carry on the train journey. Here she has reconnected with another traveller and tomorrow they're heading out to walk the hills here for 3 days or so...I'm envious of their commitement to walking yet I'm also satisfied with my commitement to relaxing and taking things pretty easy! We discussed different characters we'd met along the road and came to conclusion that part of the joy of travelling alone (as she was before she met the other traveller) was meeting other people and sharing time and space...I wrote of this last time and hold true to it. One of the reasons certain places are remembered with such fondness and stimulate joy in my heart are the people I've met. Having limited Chinese means that most of these people were other travellers (English speaking Chinese included) because there is only so far one can get with thank you and hello when it comes down to the nitty gritty of human communication. Meeting folk along the way has made the way more memorable and special! I'm sure there are travellers with different thoughts on this topic who would completely apose my theory and that's ok! I can only speak for myself.

I met a man yesterday who had travelled through South East Asia quite extensively and he was giving me tad bits of advice on certain places, Laos in particular because I was heading there. It was funny, he claimed to LOVE Laos and all that she had to offer yet by the end of our conversation I was sitting there frightened to move from safe and super developed China. ALL the roads are TERRIBLE, the people will TRY to take ALL my money like VUlTURES eating a carcass, the weather is AWFULLY hot and mosquitos will EAT me alive, the Food is EXPENSIVE and not as good as China, The accommodation is RIDICULOUS and not as cheap and reliable as China, the Trekking is MUCH better in CHinA etc....From all I'd heard about Laos before I felt terribly ignorant and foolish for having any positive thoughts...so now Laos will be a surprise! I'll expect nothing and just hope I survive the hoards of blood sucking mosquitos, the gulping, guzzling, grabbing locals reaching at my limited funds...ha ha! A new chapter awaits!

So from China I say farewell and next contact will be from Laos, mysterious Laos...

Images from here and there.

The Monastary in Shangri-la was under construction. The soil was rich and the plants plentiful and where ever you looked one saw HUGE marijuana plants growing wild! It was at first a novelty to see the plants and I giggled like a kid at the sight and then I realised they were everywhere in the Monastary.

Lhasa Restaurant in Shangri-la was run by a super friendly Tibetan man who had a little girl about one and a half and when there was music playing she boogied hard! So we, a group of 8 gathered around her and danced and clapped as she attempted to immitate any dance she deemed worthy enough to be replicated. When she got tired of trying she would clap and we would clap in response and we danced for a good couple of hours with her...to the point where she was yawning as part of her routine. She experimented with her head movement, walking like and egyptian, grinding down to the ground, shaking her behind etc...it was so beautiful! A friend has the video and if i recieved it I will post it.

Lijiang!!! The old town was a maze of endless shops and eateries and more shops shops shops then the bars and night spots. After having had very little sleep and a been on a bus for four hours we found our lodgings had a cat nap and set out to find food in the pouring tropical rain. We found a set of stalls selling strange little treats and took turns in choosing different options, some tasty some questionable and then by chance we stumbled upon the street with all the bars and entered the rhelm of MADNESS! Ay yay yay!!!! First of all there was a herd of umbrellas competing for space on the walking path and then the sounds started creeping up, LOUD pumping base from each bar, blasting, blaring beats from brightly lit bars with bundles of brawling shouting, singing people releasing their darksides into the anonymity of Lijiang. Each bar with different music and vibes ranging from traditional folk dance to sleazy and sauntry pretty chinese women bumping and grinding to techno beats with chinese lyric a top. It was never ending, one bar after another and then 20 more and on either side of the stream that divided the road. Each bar also had some hired man power attempting to lure the umbrella party into the bar to join the chaos inside! I walked with my jaw on my chest holding on to my friend as he signified a smidgeon of reality. I felt like i was having an outer body experience in a moulin rouge type movie, the colours the vibrance and noise the weight and the uncontrolled release of each individual...it was WILD!!!!!!

Shangri-la la la la la la Lijianggggg Dali

Shangri-la: a permanently happy land, isolated from the outside world.

Shangri-la is often used in a similar context to which "Garden of Eden" might be used, to represent a paradise hidden from modern man. It can sometimes be used as an analogy for a life-long quest or something elusive that is much sought. For a man who spends his life obsessively looking for a cure to a disease, such a cure could be said to be that man's "Shangri-La". It also might be used to represent perfection that is sought by man in the form of love, happiness, or Utopian ideals. It may be used in this context alongside other mythical and famous examples of somewhat similar metaphors such as The Holy Grail, El Dorado and The Fountain of Youth. (Thanks wikipedia)

Shangri-la!!!
Having just read what wiki had to say about Shangri-la I had to smile and sigh a sigh of joy because I had a most amazing time in Zhongdian, Yunnans claim to the 'Garden of Eden'. Perhaps I am a sucker cause part of my amazing time was due to the fact that I met an amazing man and a group of other amazing humans and together we indulgded in the excitement of sharing time and space in paradise.

Filling our bellies with good wholesome food,
gracing our ears with glorious and diverse musical sounds,
moving our bodies in extatic flow,
telling tales and inspiring laughter that took me to tears of joy at times, appreciating the surroundings and knowing that the fun together was impermanant and should therefore be enjoyed in each and every second of experiencing it!
I felt as though on fire for 6 days, intoxicated by life,
elated by the simplest of activities...

Shangri-la was spent playing backgammon,
sipping on tibetan butter tea (good for the altitude i was told),
visiting local markets filled with some of the most exotic produce I have ever seen!
Cabbages the size of my torso,
aubergines the length of my shin,
frogs the size of toads-ranging in shades of green-
bunched up in buckets waiting to be sold
and consumed in some local speciality,
Eels swimming happily,
darting back and forth in their oxygynated tanks
daring the brave to take them home,
Yak heads delicately placed besides their intestines
beneath their hanging and dangling carcasses,
some with smiles on their faces others with scorns of remorse!
Tofu in all shapes and sizes, noodles galore,
black chickens and pink, live ducks and dead,
Green leaves from all walks of life,
Mint in abundance - so fresh and delicious
especially in morrocan tea which we made for 3.5 yuan
and supplied to over 15 folk.
Honey dripping from the honeycombs
and poured directly into ones container,
so sweet and sticky and golden and delicious!
grasshopper and snails,
trotters and pig tails...
I ate lots of dumpling and steamed buns,
I drank Yak milk with yak butter tea,
I ate yak pie which was absolutely DELICIOUS!!!
and drank chinese rice wine till my head span.

And I mentioned I met a man...

The woman in me was awoken once again. I'm a sucker for a romance and realise more and more that this little heart of mine loves to love and to be loved in return! Yet short and sweet serves me fine right now, nothing long term and complicated I seek. This time of my life is for me to do what's best for the betterment of me and if I continue to be as lucky as I have been in meeting special men just for a short time then I adhere to the saying, better to have love and lost(lust) than never loved at all! Each fleeting relationship with each traveller I have encountered has been so intense and wonderful not because they'll be friends for life but in the moment it is real and the bullshit isn't apparent! I've had some of the most incredible conversations which have opened my eyes to different worlds. Discussing the army with some Israeli travellers and hearing their stories first hand of losing friends and loved ones, or gaining insight into what it's like for a Tibetan from Lhasa to be living in China...the act of sharing so simple and clear.

The slight downside of experiencing such blissful moments is that when the next step of the journey is taken the emptiness sits. I sat with emptiness when I arrived here in Dali two days ago. Not sadness or depression just a sense of loss and the natural feeling of missing the people you spent time with. I missed Noa my Koala friend. I missed the lovely man I shared 6 days with, I missed the lady who sold me butter tea and the friendly faces of the staff at my hostel. So I spent some hours in front of the machine facebooking and emailing, youtubing and skyping, I slept for 16 hours straight and woke up yesterday feeling like a new human ready for new adventures! So now I am in Dali for real and last night I met a new group of troupers. I did some fire twirling last night for the first time in 6 years and despite being a bit nervous with the fire I had so much fun and will go back to the Bad Monkey and join in the fire show tonight. My heart was racing so fast i thought it would pop out of my chest from the rush that came after having first played again. the whirling whooshing sound of the fire surrounding me was just fantabulous!!!

I also spoilt myself and indulged in a traditional chinese whole body massage which was heavenly, at times a bit painful but the release after the pain was worth it...I am tempted to go back today for another foot massage because I can! I spent the rest of my day yesterday browsing through the endless stream of shops shops shops selling everything and anythings one could ask for! I bought some pants and now have to throw out some pants cause my back pack cannot fit much more innit! I considered being a good tourist today and visiting some of the local attractions but I must admit I do not have the heart for it. My desire sits in being able to sit at a nice cafe with a book and inbetween reading about Ghengis observing the local and tourist masses cruise control around the old city drinking either some fruit juice or a beer and being open to human interaction if it should come my way. I'll be leaving for The south of Yunnan province tomorrow evening and hope to be in Laos by wednesday to see my beautiful friend Dario!!!! Very exciting!

And on that note, here's a poem my man friend shared with me:

There is pleasure in the pathless woods,
There is a rapture on the lonely shore,
There is society, where none intrudes,
By the deep sea, and music in its roar:
I love not man the less, but Nature more,
From these our interviews, in which I steal
From all I may be, or have been before,
To mingle with the Universe, and feel
What I can ne'er express, yet cannot all conceal.

LORD BYRON, Childe Harold

Tanita

Litang to Doacheng and Yading!

Right now I feel like a million dollars in fact a billion dollars! I'm in Shangri-la and have been having the most wonderful couple of days. My last blog I spoke of the loneliness and like a I predicted, in no time i would meet some super humans, I did. I met a lovely lady traveller coincidently heading in the same direction as me. We decided we would journey to a national park called Yading together and explore all that is to be discovered so we set off in a mini van with a very energetic Tibetan driver and a windy road ahead (every road in the mountains seems to be windy and slightly bumpy). We arrived in Daocheng to a very cosy little hostel with a gorgeous garden...the garden was filled with flowers, some vegetables and at least 15 huge canabis plants towering way above my head. The lady working there spoke immaculate english and we were able to acquire all the necessary information about our journey to the national park....Rubber boots, poncho,warm clothes, good lungs, lots of enthusiasm and a great sense of adventure! So i spent some money (too much i'm told) on a fancy rain jacket, strange but pretty rain boots(pretty cause they had upsidedown hearts on them...made for a lady like I) and some thick socks. We set off at 8 and the ride there was beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. Misty blankets covering the hills, smoking steam rising from the mountains, small showers inbetween blue skies which kept us slight optimistic about the weather and also anxious about the inevitable rain and what that would mean for seeing the snowy mountains we so eagerly awaited.

After 2 hours our 3 hour journey came to an abrubt stop outside a slightly official looking building...our driver went out and chatted with his fellow Tibetan driver comrades, returned and told us to get out with our bags...(his english was limited) so without choice we got out with our bags wondering if this was Yading??? Yading??? Yes? No? Finally an English speaker explained that the driver could go no further and that as of today tourists entering Yading have to take an "official" bus which cost 120 yuan (which is madness cause there was only an hour left) So having no choice and slight frustration at having to pay for the bus and the entrance fee we set off once again, now with an English speaking super energetic Tibetan man who took us under his wing. He decided we would sleep at the same hostel (which he luckily organised) and that we would walk together too...which was great! So the 7 of us (3 chinese, 1 south korean, 1 israeli, 1 tibetan and myself) set of up the mountain to see one of the sacred snowy mountains and pearl lake. We were about 3900 meters above sea level and heading up to 4200. It was a bit of a struggle with the altitude working against us and it was worth it. the air was fresh, the scenery spectacular and we were moving, i was moving. On the road i've felt a little lazy at times and the need for physical activity has been sought when possible...stairs or escalator? stairs! The array of scents was also so refreshing and I felt so content with life and her presents. My new friend Noa from Litang is a Koala and koala as you may know take there time but she was so good and despite not feeling up for the walk completed it succesfully and when we sat at pearl lake (which was green, emerald green and very very tranquilo with the cloud covered mountain in front of us) we all felt utterly content and blissful. Many many photos were taken and many many poses were done, created and done again...the most popular being the jump in the air and hope the photographer captures the moment. We hung up there because we were happy and also with the hope that the mountain would clear and we could see her majesty in all her glory! And with all our hopes and some prayers she cleared and she blessed us with her naked presence. She was pretty amazing!!! the contrast with the green lake and the pine trees surrounding it with the rock snow covered mountain towering in the back and reflecting in the water was a sight indeed! once the cloud covered again we decended and food became the next mission (as it often is).

We stayed at a Tibetan run hostel and ate a most delicious dinner cooked and eaten in their kitchen. Lots of delicious spice, veges and Yak! My introduction to yak had started and continues to sneak into my list of consumptions.

The next day we arose before dawn ate a hearty local breakfast of butter tea, rice porridge, runny fried eggs, freshly baked round barley bread and a porridge that took me back to my child hood (it tasted like pro-nutro). Then we set off for the big climb. we were to walk 4km, take an electric car for 8km. walk for 8km (uphill the whole time) see two more beautiful lakes, take photos, walk back 8km, take the electric car for 8km, walk back 4km and then take the bus back to Daocheng....Yes! Ok! No problem! How many hours? 5 hours...No problem! Ok! Lets go! And off we went. My Koala friend was not up for it so she took her time and decided she would not go the whole way...the sky was filled with grey weeping clouds and after the efforts of the previous day our bodies were a bit more tried and tested. My enthusiasm was tenfold and i was ready to run up the mountain if possible. We walked up the 4km in 45 mins no problem. we took the electric car which was slightly chilly and wet but we got where we needed to be to start walking. We walked on the wooden platform and all was copasetic. we started walking on the grass towards the mountain and discovered that it was grass yes, but it was marshland and it was getting wetter and wetter. I felt happy to get out my pretty rain boots...I was the only one the rest were wearing shoes similar to converse!!! material and non weather resistant! As we started towards the trees away from the marshes the mud became apparent. A group of tibetan cowboys then came over and offered us to take some horses for the small fee of 300 yuan. Of course we refused and they insisted that it would be a long and tedious walk because the paths were filled with mud and horse dropping, there were streams and small rivers, there were steep passes and mere mortals would not be capable of doing it....we still refused and laughed at their dramatic speech and their good salesmanship...we were not going to fall for it...we were set to trek up the mountain come what may!

And up I went ahead cause i could with my superrain boots. Then i'd wait for the others to catch up and so the journey went. the mud was at times so intense and gluggy. the horse droppings were everywhere both a hindrance and a good indicator of which way for me to go and the others to avoid and seek alternative routes through the trees to limit the disaster to their shoes. After 3 hours we reached a mountain. it was raining fairly consistantly and the lakes were still not apparent. My patience was being tested as i now had to wait much longer periods of time for the rest of the troupe to catch up and was groing anxious about the journey down and back to doacheng in the light hours of the day. I walked for a further half an hour steadily up and then my instinct said turn round go back...the lakes would just be a cherry on top, the journey was the most important. And so I did...i simply started walking back. I came accross the troup who were struggling but determined to go the 9 yards. So i continued back and they continued up. I walked in the mud, the poo, the water much more carelessly than the way up. I almost feel many times and hunger started creeping up on me. I made it back to the bus stop, wet, muddy, hungry but still happy for the journey i'd had so far. still optimistic and filled with the joy of being in nature and moving. So i waited for the bus...and waited...and waited...and waited...(it rained and the chilled wind blew)...and i waited. And my patience once again was tested. My thoughts wandered along the paths of, 'what kind of service is this...i paid money and expect that a bus should come....and how dare they demand so much money and not deliver the goods...this wouldn't happen in europe or Oz...thee people know nothing of service...and started to deteriorate to, fucking hurry up and get here!!! after 50 minutes finally an electric car came filled with chinese tourists and cameras! I was so relieved and my former slanders were forgotten. So i enthusiastically sat in the car and indicated that we should go...and the driver indicated that we had to wait for the tourists to return from taking photos. so I waited more...half an hour later i was in tears and swearing to no one. I kicked the benches and swore the families of the drivers. I cursed and spluttered and shouted to the deaf heavens...the drivers sat stared at me with blank expressions and I continued to insist that we should go NOW!!! NOW!!!! NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! eventually another bus came and he took me back face teary, heart and soul so consumed with Anger and frustration and disdain for all who crossed my path. One of the men in the car tried to practise his english with me and i told him not to talk to me or i'd cry! he stopped! once i got to the bus stop I started running, running down the hill as fast as i could, running like a crazy woman...i don't run usually, and yet running seemed like the most natural thing to do. i stomped in the mud, the shit, the puddles and just ran ran ran...when i reached the entrance i round Noa the koala, ate 8 big steamed buns and we set off for Daocheng.

My head was throbbing and the adrenalin pumping through my body was immense. I had not in recent times felt so ANGRY!!! And it was magnificent...FEELING!Feeling is amazing!

And now i must go and eat breakfast....Shangri la will be the next installment!